Not Tonight Darling
An Ijebu man married for 10 years discovered to his dismay, that his wife was no longer attractive. Her hair was unkempt, her clothes were not sexy and her nice figure was now replaced by fat.
Without warning, he decided to marry a younger, sexually attractive light skinned wife, and brought her home as his second wife. The man then devised a rota, whereby, the wife who cooked will have the pleasure of having her husband that night.
However, the first wife noticed that when it was her turn, her husband would do nothing but sleep in her bed till day break. Yet, when it was the turn of the younger wife, the husband will start whistling around the house as soon as he finished eating the younger wife's meal.
The first wife noticed the happy expression on her husband's face and knew her husband was surely getting some action.
One day, the first wife confronted her two best friends and explained her plight to them. They laughed out loud and told her what to do, that henceforth, she will be getting plenty of action from her husband.
So came the night when it was the first wife's turn, she prepared hot Iyan (pounded yam) with vegetable stew which included assorted meats. The husband was taken aback. The wife then placed two big guinness bottles in front of him. As the husband ate, the wife said she was going to have a shower and put on some sexy clothing.
The husband was so exicited by this that he was looking forward to their night of passion. By this time, the younger wife bade her husband goodnight and went into her room.
After eating the sumptuous meal and drinking the two bottles of guinness, the husband was "rearing to go". As the duty of the male head, he had to check that all the doors was properly secured in the house.
As he passed through the younger wife's room, he noticed her door was slightly ajar, he peeped inside and just about caught a slight glimpse of her volumptous sexy figure as she bent down to
change into her nightie. Although it was not the younger wife's turn that night, the husband threw all caution to the wind and romped with the younger wife.
Meanwhile, the first wife was waiting impatiently for her husband, who still had not showed up. She thought maybe he was busy resting in his room after that heavy meal and would come to her later. By 2.am, still no sign of the husband. By 3.am, the husband suddenly awoke from the younger wife's room and remembered he was supposed to be with the first wife. He slipped out and sneaked into the first wife's room, thinking she was fast asleep.
As soon as the first wife saw him, a smile lit her face. She placed an arm on his body, but he casually tossed it away. She tried again, and he did the same thing. The wife was aggrieved and said;
"Ba Rasaki, ki de?" (what's wrong)
"Mo ti yi bon yen" (Literally means I just climaxed)
"Haaa, ko ti wi? Wa tun yen" (what did you say? You have to "shoot your bullets again")
(changing the subject)"Oti nmu, ma de fa efori mi ke" (the alcohol I drank is giving me bad headache)
"Emi re yen, wo mo owun oko loni" (look at me properly, you don't know what you are in for today")
Submitted By Tunde Adeleye
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