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Author Name: Debbie Ogunjobi
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This too will pass.
Author: Debbie Ogunjobi | May 01, 2009

Most people are scared of storms, I know as a child that I didn?t particularly care for thunder; I was terrified by the sound of its fury and was always startled by the flash of lightening that preceded it. It always seemed primitive, threatening and violent. If truth be told I still don?t care much for thunder and lightning but geography and experience have taught me the science beyond the phenomenon and I know it passes. The most violent of storms passes at one point or the other and I have learnt to just wait it out. It would be great if everyday would be bright and sunny, not too hot just perfect enough to enjoy all of life?s activities but the great creator has made it such that the weather is in a constant state of change so that the world we all inhabit can keep evolving. The weather has taken centre stage of late in the news world wide as it is no longer benevolent and distant; these days it is a major threat to lives and property and I can understand why people are petrified of sudden changes in weather patterns. Global warming is no longer scientific mumbo jumbo; it is now a threat we are all facing and our survival as a species depends on the actions we take to combat it in the next few years! The weather is much like our lives, it keeps changing and it can serve up some turmoil but it passes, it always does! My new fascination with the weather has little to do with meteorology pass rather I am taking the time to say a few things to a friend who needs to hear them at this time. I have a few theories I espouse and they have been collected over a life where the storms have raged more than a few times! I freely admit and confess to not being the strongest person in the world and enjoy my bouts of self pity once in a while but all through it I have always believed that if I can just manage to hold on, it will pass. To quote my big brother ?time is a forward moving event and it will move; with or without me!!? I honestly don?t remember when I started saying this to my self but when I am in pain I just say ?This too will pass?. It may seem simple but it has always worked for me and it makes the waiting period a lot easier. It can be difficult to trust in hope when times are bad but then again one must ask, what other options are there? The resilience of the human spirit is the ability to hope and truly believe that things have to get better. Failure is a phase, it is not a permanent state, the right attitude and hard work are the major factors that can turn it around and no matter how bad one has it; there is always some one else out there who has it a lot worse! I never get tired of telling people not to lose sight of their destination; so the current situation may be bad, things may be tight, your friends turn out to be your worst enemies (pardon my French) but so bloody what? You don?t become a warrior in the time of peace, your strength is only apparent at a time of war! My friend has enjoyed phenomenal success in his field of endeavour and in a relatively short space of time too! He has always struck me as being gentle and kind hearted and I base this on my intuition and the fact that he has what I believe to be kind eyes! He is very open and in my opinion a bit too generous with information about himself and goals that he has been lucky enough to achieve. A couple of years ago I believed strongly in him enough to invest in a project of his and honestly didn?t see any reason to be chasing him around for information at every tiny juncture!! That may have been foolish on my part but while we are not the closest of friends we have enough mutual respect not to shaft one another. Well this particular project dragged on for too long and somehow went belly up with nearly all concerned ganging up in arms to form a mob ready to lynch. I didn?t really see the sense in throwing out the baby with the bath water so I managed to stay out of the mob and explore other alternatives to settle and still salvage what was possible from a good friendship! We hit a few bumps on the road but I believe an amicable settlement that should satisfy all concerned should be forthcoming quite soon. Human beings will however not cease to amaze me as I ponder the role played by his so called bosom buddies. Even those who had nothing to lose by way of money seemed to celebrate his troubles and were actively fanning the flames of discord! It always puzzles me how many people are always waiting in the wings to mock when one is in trouble! Speaking as someone who has been in such a position not once or even twice, I honestly can empathise! Why do people take joy in the downfall of their fellow man? How exactly does it increase their net worth to grind someone else into dust? And who says a down fall is the end of a man anyway? To my mind such situations are a learning curve and remain the perfect opportunity to rebound bigger and better!! I have always believed that Job in the Bible never had any friends, or why else would they have been mocking him and asking him to curse God? What kind of friend tells you that you must have done something to deserve adversity in the day of trouble? To my friend I would strongly advice to simply discountenance them and thank the good Lord that their true colours and total lack of integrity were exposed openly. I can at least speak for myself that I just wanted a solution; hanging or lynching him would not have benefited me in any way, so it made sense to just explore meaningful solutions. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that this is but a curve in the long and winding road that is my friend?s life. As sure as I am that he will definitely get through this, I am also sure that there are other bumps ahead and this particular one will equip him to get through them much better and even faster. I remember the first time I had my heart broken; I was surprised when a big brother assured me I would get over it and to expect more of the same in future! I thought that was a curse; the pain I was in back then was so severe, I was physically sick; I simply could not comprehend going through it again. Fast forward to the present and many heart breaks later I can definitely say it gets better with time, just like time; every thing passes and even this will pass. So to my friend and brother, I say the following: ? Keep your eye on your destination and not the situation, please don't be discouraged. ? I have every confidence that you will get through this; this too will pass. ? I am so proud of you and all your efforts to redress; your conscience is not a weakness but a virtue. ? The magic was and is still you and that is all you need to turn it around. ? All great men have failure in common; it is a step on the ladder of success. ? Adversity may be the stroke that opens the door to even greater advancement ? Ignore the haters; they were never your friends to begin with. Finally you should keep in mind that the hallmark of greatness is honour and you my dear brother wear it well!!

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